Some days I feel a little crazier than others. One such day was yesterday. I started the morning off meditating. I could feel the channels opening up inside me, and was actually tingling all over my chest when I finally opened my eyes. Mmm. A rejuvenated start to a new week. Or so I thought.
After a few hours, I was going through waves of manic highs and intense lows. I became anxious, my heart beating rapidly around noon. This surged downwards toward confused and frustrated as my day progressed. I heard myself whining at my friends, questioning why the hell I do what I do, how one avoids the sorts of foolish complication that I have recently created in my life. By the evening, I was actually in tears. I had an hour session of chatting with the Brit, trying to calm down.
Epiphany. It was the yoga and the breathing all weekend that did it. I had released all sorts of blocked energy which was escaping. It made me feel like I was completely losing it.
I don’t think I’m actually crazy. Just for the record. (Isn’t that what they all say?)
After a day of messages back and forth, Crazy Tattoo Guy called to figure out plans. I felt like I was going to lose it. Why is it that when you’re having a completely bipolar moment, someone always calls on the phone? Plus the continued ambiguity of what last night was, heightened the slight oddity of my moment. Is it a meeting, or is it a date? Meeting? Date? Hrmm…
Whatever it was turned out to be wicked fun. It’s been a while since I’ve sat down with someone and just giggled, and been undeniably (and somehow deviously) honest. It felt something like the conversations I had in Singapore with the self-proclaimed American playboy, who couldn’t help loving my attitude toward sex and his quest for pussy. Just hours of talking shit. It was fun listening, and egging CTG on. Sitting at dinner feeling surges of excitement and sexual energy charging around us. Except that I’m not sure it had any sort of direction. We were both just getting really pent up. Fun, fun, fun.
We actually sang songs from Disney movies as we walked down the street. Who does that? Fucking awesome.
So fortunately the mania rose skyward, and stayed up for the remainder of the night. We had a super cool time. He’s great. Just fun shit. When I got home, lightly baked and somewhat tipsy, I demolished about half a loaf of bread (toast) while chatting, as usual, to the Brit.
I guess I can call that a good day.
I just looked out the window and the sky’s actually pink. Gotta love Montreal and its Gotham City skies.
But now I’m just babbling…
